{"id":414,"date":"2023-06-28T22:07:46","date_gmt":"2023-06-28T21:07:46","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thingsistillremember.wordpress.com\/?p=414"},"modified":"2023-06-28T22:07:46","modified_gmt":"2023-06-28T21:07:46","slug":"tired-to-the-bones","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thethingsiremember.co.uk\/index.php\/2023\/06\/28\/tired-to-the-bones\/","title":{"rendered":"Tired to the bones&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>I&#8217;m getting tired again. Deep in my bones and a little in my soul too. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I&#8217;m tired of the constant rounds of blood tests and mri&#8217;s. Worrying about results. Next week it&#8217;s a biopsy of  my pancreatic cyst that continues to grow slowly but surely towards cancer or removal. A major operation more serious than having half my bowel removed. I&#8217;m so tired after plenty of sleep I&#8217;m napping on the sofa after a simple dog walk to be woken by the hospital telling me my specialist wants me in for the endoscopic ultrasound in 5 days not the 14 already arranged. And so it begins again. The stress and the worry.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>It&#8217;s not in my nature to sit about or to seek the way of immediate satisfaction whatever the consequences. I like plans and goals and little achievements on the way. I work ceaselessly and hard on the things I need to do and am rewarded well. I&#8217;ve never been that interested in the joy of fleeting holidays but more in making my everyday life enjoyable. Living in the present. Planning for the future and the now. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But I&#8217;m tired. So bloody tired&#8230;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"640\" height=\"640\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/thethingsiremember.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/06\/wickedlola_tired_to_the_bones_d2e90de0-d1c9-4b02-807c-9aa6eb2e1317.png?resize=640%2C640&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-417\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/thethingsiremember.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/06\/wickedlola_tired_to_the_bones_d2e90de0-d1c9-4b02-807c-9aa6eb2e1317.png?w=1024&amp;ssl=1 1024w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/thethingsiremember.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/06\/wickedlola_tired_to_the_bones_d2e90de0-d1c9-4b02-807c-9aa6eb2e1317.png?resize=300%2C300&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/thethingsiremember.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/06\/wickedlola_tired_to_the_bones_d2e90de0-d1c9-4b02-807c-9aa6eb2e1317.png?resize=150%2C150&amp;ssl=1 150w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/thethingsiremember.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/06\/wickedlola_tired_to_the_bones_d2e90de0-d1c9-4b02-807c-9aa6eb2e1317.png?resize=768%2C768&amp;ssl=1 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" \/><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I&#8217;m getting tired again. Deep in my bones and a little in my soul too. I&#8217;m tired of the constant rounds of blood tests and mri&#8217;s. Worrying about results. Next week it&#8217;s a biopsy of my pancreatic cyst that continues to grow slowly but surely towards cancer or removal. A&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":417,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[10],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-414","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-sometime-around-now"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/thethingsiremember.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/06\/wickedlola_tired_to_the_bones_d2e90de0-d1c9-4b02-807c-9aa6eb2e1317.png?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thethingsiremember.co.uk\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/414","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thethingsiremember.co.uk\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thethingsiremember.co.uk\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thethingsiremember.co.uk\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thethingsiremember.co.uk\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=414"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/thethingsiremember.co.uk\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/414\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thethingsiremember.co.uk\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/417"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thethingsiremember.co.uk\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=414"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thethingsiremember.co.uk\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=414"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thethingsiremember.co.uk\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=414"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}